cugc is over ler.
does it mean you and i are over too?
does the dismissal parade mark the end of us?
the last phrase everyone shouted together, ''CUGC!''
we, ended?
i really am thoroughly confused and lost.
i saw and understood the tremendous amount of stress you were under.
i wished i could help you, but i myself was stucked.
i wanted to barge into the OPS room to share that session with you.
i was senseless.
for everything i wanted to do or crossed my mind, i feared the consequences.
i was so afraid the consequences would lead us to another bag full of troubles and problems.
for a moment, i did not know what to do, neither did i knew what i was doing.
i was frantic.
in front of others, i had to appear and seem as if i was alright.
yet deep down, images of you kept flashing through false vision.

this semms weird.
something that everyone think they can comprehend, but yet it is an uncomprehendable issue. even i myself, lie with a gigantic question mark about this so-called ''problem''.
we havent spoke much since the break of camp, in fact, we didnt spoke at all.
maybe i should feel that this is no longer a weird sign anymore.
some steps i should take??
wake up,
realise that we are not what we used to be,
and we can never ever return to what we used to be,
waving goodbye to all of our past, present & future?
what future? impossible, i guess.

are we gonna ignore each other forever like this?
how long can both of us mentally endure this tormentation?
hardship you call it?
or is it the silence and stillness our relationship needs. a necessity.
time! an element which heals most things.
would time be able to heal us?
or would time just mean continuous dragging?

have both you and i dragged too too long?
a problem which lies with us : we dont know how to put a stop to things.
saying ''halt''?
a simple four alphabet word.
once again, easier said than done.
every action involves its consequences too.
the conseqeunces of four alphabets may be much more than both you and i can expect coming in our way, leading to thousands of alphabets being the consequences for our actions?

did we sacrifice our relationship because of cugc?
or our relationship already had a big problem lying within and we merely just used cugc as an excuse to cover up, and as i reason to cheat ourselves?

was cugc our root problem?
or was it a contributing factor?
a passage full of question marks?
a passage full of uncertainties.

are you even certain of who i am?
and i am certain of you too?
or do we both just lie on an unstable plank of material, going to fall anytime, probably by the seconds.